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mr right
mr right

Happy Dating

Is he “Mr Right” or is he “Mr. Not the One”
So it has been a while since you have been wandering in the much talked about Loveland and kissing frogs, hoping they would turn into prince charming but all you got is swamp’s odour in your breath and bad after taste in your mouth.
If you ask me, am ready to kiss a hundred frogs to meet my prince charming but just to save you the trouble of making the same mistakes as me, let me warn you about a few.
The Diplomacy King
This kind is most commonly found brooding over some heavy literature books or journals in libraries. He will sweep you off your feet with his well-read and intellectual bc (baat-cheet, dirty minds!). You would be raving about how polished and well-read he is. That kind of a guy is good for an academic politically correct discussion but not a relationship.
Ask him if you should confront your roomie for calling you a bitch behind your back and pat comes the reply, “That’s your prerogative dear.” Try asking him what he thinks about Mr. A and he’ll say; “We are not on the same page but I do not think of him as a bad person”. This and a bunch of other replies like “It’s a personal choice.” “We can agree to disagree.” are his favorites.
 Unless you are looking for a crash course in becoming a politician, run for your life.
The A**-licker
This guy is ready to change his DNA for you. He will do what you want, when you want and whatever way you want. While having such a faithful “paplu” can be fun for a while, you will soon start getting irritated by this “ajhel prem”. He will embarrass you in front of your friends by doing an “I love you” performance that would put Tom Cruise’s “I love Katie Holmes” to shame. Worst thing is that you will start thinking of yourself as some “hoor ki pari” who is being treated like the queen of the world. This guy has some major self-confidence issues to be trying this hard to keep a girl. Trust me, you do not want to be with this guy. (P.S.: Be ready for some major water works when you break up with this kind.)


The conveniently Momma’s boy

mama's boy

Mama mia

So you are having a great time together and everything seems to be too good to be true. It probably is. Just when you think he is ready to take the next big step, he blurts out; “Actually, my mom is not OK with our relationship” Wow. Did you ask your mom before sticking your tongue in my mouth? Huh. In most of the cases, this was his plan from the beginning. Just throw a “Jab We Met” style “Teri Maa ki” at his face and walk away.
The Chandler
This guy is life’s cheerleader. The ever smiling, ever happy, humor king types. Trust me nobody can be this happy all the time. It’s most probably a cover for something else. Become his girlfriend and you are in danger of being exposed to extremely rude behavior and unwarranted anger. You are neither his punching bag nor his mental flush tank. Just vacuum him out of your life.
The Psycho
So you have been getting a lot of strange calls since you broke up with your guy. Most probably you dated a psycho who scribbled your number in metro’s male washrooms, fake FB profiles and where not. These psychos are self-obsessed crazy people who cannot digest it when you leave them. Catch them early. Don’t cut them any slack. One line tip: Look out for crazy eyes.
This guy invented the FBI, the GPS tracking system and even the cute little pug of Vodafone. Don’t mistake his “Where are you babu” for innocent care and affection.” Who’s your daddy” is best left for your naughty time. You have a dad and do not need another, period.
Last but not the least, stay clear of any guy who wants to go Full Monty on first date.
Enough of the don’ts. Then what are we supposed to “do” to find the “one”. Clichéd as it may sound, but there is no checklist for the right guy. You will just know it’s him and one thing that you can be sure about is that you will feel happy with him and would not need to pretend, to customize yourself. Till the time that happens, steer clear of all the frogs that I have already warned you about.
Your prince charming is just around the corner.
Happy Dating  🙂
Mr Right

Mr Right

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