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Coach TOM & Captain JERRY in Cricket Capers

While touring in Zimbabwe, JAM’s sports correspondent Ramchandra Mutt encountered Tom and Jerry. Closer inspection revealed that they were Indian cricket team coach Greg Chappal and captain Sau-run Ganguly. While Ganguly escaped, quoting some commercial commitments, Ramu managed to tie Chappal down for a one-to-one (interview, not fight, sillies).

R: What exactly happened, between you and Sau-run?
C: Well, it all started one night after a drinks session. A few Fosters down, I grumbled about the heater-tap in my bathtub not working, and having to take bath in extremely cold water. Ganguly refused to believe that, so I told him to come and see for himself.

R: But did you tell him to “step down from the captaincy”?
C: No, actually I told him to “step down under the tap-and-see”. The din in the pub might have had something to do with the whole problem.

R: Ahh, so the whole fight was over this miscommunication?
C: Well, not really. It had more to do with some disagreements on who is going to pay for all those Fosters.

R: So what justification did Ganguly offer for staying on as captain?
C: He spoke rather passionately about the tons of runs he scored recently, although he wasn’t nearly as loud when he specified it was Playstation Cricket he was talking about.

R: What about the reports that you are jealous of Ganguly?
C: Hahaha, that’s a pointless allegation. Why should I be jealous? Just because Ganguly has numerous endorsement deals and earns crores despite being out of form while I get nothing at all?…Ahh, ok maybe you do have a point there.

R: The next big series for India is when the Lankans come down later next month. Looking forward to that?
C: Yeah, it’s always fun when the Lankans come down. Lots of dancing in bars and stuff like that, you know. Especially Murali, he’s really popular with these dance bars.

R: What about team strategies? Any changes?
C: Yeah, we will probably be making a couple of changes in the team; will probably try to fit in two new players – Aditya Pan-choli and Tarannum.

Saying so, Chappell walked away singing what sounded suspiciously like a Bappi Lahiri number.

– Sreeram Ramachandran

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