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Boyfriend+Girlfriend=Faltoo Tension

Want to lead an uncomplicated life? Don’t acquire a BF/ GF, says Abhinav Jain because…

A popular, well-lit, and busy eating joint. Big flat screen television playing in a corner. Round little shining tables with nice angular chairs around it. A guy and a girl seated on either side of the table. Guy reaches into a paper bag and pulls out a box of chocolates.

Guy ( handing over the box to the girl ) – Hey , I got this for you , I guess you like chocolates.
Girl – Oh, Thank you ! I love them.

Scenario 1:
Girl thinks – Ueee ma, it will be fun eating all of these chocolates. Ek ek ko chaba daalungi. Calorie consciousness gaya tel lene.

Scenario 2:
Girl thinks – Ueee ma, I am accepting gifts from him again. But why is he a lil’ cold these days? He has not been his normal self since the time that new girl with coloured hair has joined our class. Even the chocolates he gifted me are Cadburys. Why couldn’t he gift me one of those Swiss ones? Maybe he hates me, now that I have put on weight. Hell, I am so scared and anxious now. These chocolates look as tasty as a Dettol soap to me.

Nah, my brain is not having one of its go-wild-with-imagination exercises. I was part of scenario 1 recently and I humbly suggest that the girl in question should go on an jog every morning to burn the calorie infested chocolates she relished without offering any to me.

How delightful a simple guy-gal friendship is, rather than a coochie-coochie–more-than-friendship ishq vishq. Kasam Bhawani ki, the expectations & possession ka fundaa that creeps in when a friend becomes your girlfriend is one wierd issue – at least for a ‘tension-nahi’ insaan like me. I gifted her chocolates because she is a friend, and I wanted her to have fun gobbling them up… This relation is so simple, natural and free of muddled feelings and assumed expectations.

But the moment the guy proposes things take a turn for the worse. Till last Sunday, Rahul and Shruti, classmates in college, were friends. Then, Rahul proposed and Shruti accepted. Now Rahul calls Shruti “My girl”. I mean, yeh “My girl” kya hota hai Rahul Kaka, yeh koi cycle hai kya ki tum bolo “my cycle”? So, if Shruti decides goes out on a lunch with her barso ka dost Vineet, Rahul narrows his eyes and asks her “Tera koi chakkar hai kya uske saath?” and promises to throw export quality acid on her if the answer is in the affirmative.

If Rahul does not send Shruti a bunch of fresh roses on the day-we-met anniversary, Shruti calls him up; says Hello, then coughs, then sobs and then breaks into a long wail which ends with “You are not the same Rahul”. And Hanuman Jee na kare, if Shruti goes out to shop and spots Rahul with a pretty girl on his bike’s back seat, she will throw dangerously heavy things at Rahul till he proves that the girl was in fact a cousin he was going to drop at maths tution.

Dekho jee, I have minimal experience of having a girlfriend. But to my underdeveloped dimaag, a simple friendship is a very direct and delightful relationship to have. Maybe these complications between Rahul and Shruti would not have happened if they trusted each other. In fact, that would’ve been a very kaleje ko thanda karne wali thought . It is always cool to let feelings grow naturally rather than do things just because he/ she is your girlfriend/ boyfriend.

Maybe I am just too immature to handle the responsibility a commitment demands. But in my opinion, one can be a lot more frank and a lot more natural with a girl who is just happy to see a box of chocolates, instead of getting worried over other girl with colored hair.

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