The League of Towel Phiksers
With the latest development in IPL, they have now decided to make a change for the next instalment of the series. Probably Dawood Ibrahim will sponsor his own team next year, and it’ll be called, ‘The Royal Towel Fixers’.
Spot fixing—the new black spot on the uniform of IPL that even packet full of Tide cannot wash away. Of course fixing isn’t new to the world of cricket; there were plenty of juggernauts in the years before who were caught with their hands in the candy jar. But that brings me to the question, “WHY SREESANTH?”
He’s no juggernaut, he’s no legend, hell…he’s not even a player, c’mon, the guy sucks! He couldn’t hit the wickets with a homing laser guided ball and no batsman standing on the crease. Why would you pay him money to play bad? That’s like paying the Tortoise from the Aesop fable to run slower than the Hare. Of course that Tortoise eventually wins, but Sreesanth never does, because the guy couldn’t hit a ball even when it was rolled towards him parallel to the ground, slower than a snail on that tortoise’s back.
Although it wasn’t just Sreesanth, there were other players too who were caught for the same thing. Ajit Chandila and Ankeet Chavhan were the other two who had decided to waste their entire careers because they got to sleep with hot chicks. I’m morals aren’t the first thing that comes to mind when a drunk chick is in your drunk hands.
It is said that the bookies paid them well over 60 lakhs to play badly; it’s amazing how cheap you can get dignity for nowadays. The bookies also offered them other favors like a Hummer, fancy cars, and women. The news that day was so extremely clichéd that Mahesh Bhatt thought he was watching a trailer for the sequel of Jannat.
During the news it was reported that Ajit Chandila got himself a pair of jeans and a watch that cost him 2.5 lakhs! Now I’m no fashion expert, I just get up every day, put on anything that can be classified under clothes, and leave for office. But I don’t understand What The #&$@ am I supposed to do with a jeans that is more expensive than my wardrobe, my room, and my whole building put together. Unless those jeans have gold chain planted on a platinum zipper and are so comfortable that you never ever need to wear underwear again, I don’t see the utility.
But don’t let the prospect of a comfortable jeans distract you from the main topic.
Cricket is said to be a game of gentlemen, sadly nowadays ever since the IPL came along, Cricket has become the game of businessmen. And wherever there is a stench of ridiculous amounts of money you’ll most probably find the nose of crime buried deep inside it. This spot fixing wasn’t the first time Cricket got fixed, and it most definitely wouldn’t be the last. No matter how vigil you stay, the bookies will always find a way to evade your eyes and fix the outcome to their benefits.
Will you ever be able to enjoy cricket like you did? Won’t every dropped catch, or overthrown ball make you feel like that guy is a fraudulent bastard who just earned sixty lakhs for playing badly? Wont all this seriously make you reconsider Cricket as a career option rather than other useless stuff like, writing? What will happen to this game when everyone starts doubting all their fave players present on field, looking for telltale signs of a signal to a bookie?
In fact I myself had a slight hunch about some other players too who might also be into this, but then I realized that they are from my home team ‘Pune Warriors’. So don’t worry, no fixing there. They just actually suck—it’s their natural game. Sigh…