FOUR INDIAN SUPERHEROES WE NEED ON THE BIG SCREEN
Tired of Viking gods pretending to be aliens while looking totally human? Bored by time travelers and detectives with British accents? Exhausted by Batman/Iron-man (=Batman in a red suit with better punch lines)? Indian geeks have made their way into the global lexicon of nerd-dom since long before Raj finally started to talk in front of Penny on Big Bang Theory. Here, for your delectation, are five variations on the types of heroes and super-villains we’d all like to see on big screen soon (but probably won’t). Put your suggestions in comments for us!
“Krishna the Blue”, Coolest Superhero of all time: Excellent origin story. His is the story of mischievous child-adolescence, many feats of daring and great strength, a magical appeal that charmed village belles and cows alike, totally rock star love interest in the form of the one woman who would both put up with the gopis AND die for him, vulnerable to pain, broody and angsty at times, has an entire canonical text on political, ethical and military philosophy to his name. Also credited with ruling a now-lost/submerged city of mythical times, major playa on the political scene of one of the greatest epics ever told, looks damn good in a loincloth. MAKE THIS MOVIE, IMMEDIATELY. Probably will be played by Hrithik Roshan, despite the dictates of common sense.
Veerappan, King of Bandits: In 3D, crashing through the scrublands of South India. The story of the intricacies and the hierarchies of operating in a no-man’s land where everything and everyone is out to get you. An outlaw, a ruthless killer, fearless and feared, never averse to laying all his cards on the table to take care of those under his protection. Since this is a superhero movie, let’s play it this way – he can see the future but always reads it wrong, resulting in mistakes, murder and mayhem every which way we turn. The moustaches of a sex god, the inevitable, painful and prolonged death of a hunter turning into the hunted, this man could be the Macbeth of superheroes. His suspicions, paranoia, bloodlust, endless killings and unsated ambition resulted in the destruction of everything around him. But in his lifetime, a man to be respected if not loved, eventually to be consumed by his self-destructiveness. A role tailor made for Kay Kay Menon.
Netaji the Immortal: hiding still in the jungles, biding his time, building his strength for the greatest wars India will ever see. Hailed as a hero by a bewildered, somewhat disbelieving but mostly enthusiastic populace, his years of solitude in the wild have given him a steely self-sufficiency that serves him well when called to battle. Invincible, unbreakable, unforgettable, still bitter about his years of exile, this is a tortured soul struggling to come to grips with the post-millennium world around him. But when it comes down to it, the forces of the wild will come out of the darkness to help him fight the good fight. Parambrata Chatterjee will try to get this role but in all likelihood Aamir Khan will get to it first and probably want to write/direct/produce/market it also.
SuperIndianITGuy: can hack everything (and does). Associated with an underground network of off-the-grid hackers who have eyes and ears everywhere but are seen nowhere. Diffident and nerdy in everyday life, undercover spy and occasional mole in the system when needed. Gaming freak, secretly a fitness buff, loves bungee-jumping and Cornettos, in love with the same woman since he was eighteen who is his best friend now and has friend-zoned him, seemingly for life. If this role does not go to Kunal Nayyar from Big Bang Theory someone deserves to be shot.