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Dr Shamrao Kalmadi College (KHS), Pune when…

* You are asked to pay a fine of Rs 200/- for bunking one lecture (which no one has ever paid since the college was inaugurated)

* You have to attend lectures in the pre-primary school building. At the same time as theirs.

* You are also called ‘uncle’ by these kids and ‘bhaiyya’ by their teacher.

* You have to call a mini football ground your college campus.

* You have to wear a uniform in which you are sometimes confused for a Mc Donald’s worker.

* Wearing shades, wrist bands etc is a crime which can lead you to the Principal’s office and result in your parents being called to college

* A 16 X 16 Room is your ‘college canteen’. Where you are served only vada pav and cold drinks.

* You are charged Rs 1.50/- for parking your cycle, Rs 2.50/- each day for your mopeds and Rs 3/- for your geared bikes. Yet every other day a mirror, side indicator or headlight is found broken…

* You are given a 5 Star Chocolate for winning Inter-zilla Cup.

* You have no right to be within a radius of 10km of college after college hours.

* You are asked to Pay Rs 50/- every year as a fee for the printouts which you can never take from an invisible printer

* You can’t have a girl / boyfriend else you are suspended for a week.

* You are called a ‘geek’ for talking in English!

– Ishann Patel, ex-KHSite

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