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Canteen Quandry

Fellow collegians, now many of you from Government colleges (and few from private ones) have had the misfortune of having a peculiar canteen. Bearing this in mind, I have decided to give you a glimpse of my own college cafeteria.

Without beating about the bush, I would like to say my canteen is a toilet. No, I mean quite literally. A very ingenious former principal once felt the need of a cafeteria and without much ado, converted one of the loos into an eatery. Ironically, the food that comes out of our canteen looks fit to be going down the toilet. Another irony is that after a snack at the canteen, you will find yourself having frequent trips to the toilet.

For most students, a visit to the canteen is not an option but a necessary evil. The most important raison d’être of a rendezvous to the canteen would be because it’s economical. Also, law colleges are known for their various extra-curricular activities such as mock courts, jail visits, publishing of Law Reviews and so on and so forth. This busy schedule denies the average law student of a nice, long and comfortable meal at a decent culinary establishment. Hence, a trip to the canteen is inevitable.

But we have our share of jokes about the benefits of the college canteen. Since most of us would grow up to be crooked lawyers and may have to serve time, this will prepare us for the jail food. This can even help curb betting in the college as most of the well-off students eating food in the canteen are there because they lost some bet or the other. If the principal wants to have a perfect attendance, then the defaulters must be forced to consume a bowl of the patented canteen chutney. After he/she is discharged from the hospital, he/ she will make it a point to attend lectures regularly thereafter. This will also prove to be an effective deterrent to future defaulters.

Since my fate is sealed for the next three years, I would request you, my fellow
students, to have faith in God and pray for my well-being and that of my stomach.

– Sushant Shetty, Government Law College, Mumbai

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