Don’t some people take life very seriously? They are left with no other option but to post about it on Facebook. They want to sleep, wake up, bath, cough, sneeze, puke, or even die, about all this serious business on Facebook.
If you are the one who is doing a research on various kinds of morons, facebook.com would be really of great help.
While you take your time to update, we tell you about some of the different categories of attention seekers you can see or you don’t want to see on Facebook.
Mitali is a normal teenager who loves the good things in life, like going out for movies, bunking classes. This is a post from Mitali on Facebook which maybe can better describe her ‘normalcy:’
Mitali: “I am waiting for my bus, even though it’s such a pleasant weather today, its spring people but my bus just refuses to come. Oh God when will the bus come??”
Dear Mitali-waiting-for-bus, maybe your bus is not that fond of spring, maybe it likes rains, have you ever asked? And how the hell your 400 or some friends on Facebook would know that when will your bus come, unless they are driving it!
“The Self Proclaimed Virtual Babas’: “Life is nothing but an adventure.” okay we never thought of life that way, maybe you gave us an interesting perspective towards life!! “Life is all about dreaming and following your dreams, no matter what you feel, dreams are an integral part of your life” Forget about all the swamijis and babas for the life gyaan you want or don’t! There are these Virtual Babas explaining you all about life and dreams. Maybe you can just wish that a big UFO hits them on the head while they are dreaming or predicting life.
“Look At Me And Me And Me And Also Me:” “I just got a haircut, OMG! I look so cute, seriously!!!” The only fact that you have added the word ‘seriously’ to the post, explains the thing that you were never cute before. Or even if you make a whole nest for breeding sparrows on your head every time you get a haircut, does it look like we care?
“I am In A Relationship, Wait, I am Single, No I am Married:” Even if you give birth to 11 children by just updating your status as ‘married’, we can’t come to feed your babies! There are people who will update their status today as single, then married and then again single and then in a relationship.
“I Feel Suicidal”: “I don’t want to live anymore, my life is screwed, I want to die, why was I even born!” Well you were born because of some natural phenomenon that take place on this planet and maybe also to torture us with your depressing status updates. If you feel so bad about yourself, then rather than seeking for attention or sympathy on Facebook, go out and talk to a friend about your problems.
“The Show Offs”: You get them everywhere. They are omnipresent. “Just dropped my girlfriend to her place in my BMW, had such an amazing time with her” You do you need to tell us about your girlfriend or the BMW? Even if you took her by a rickshaw, we don’t care!!
“Everybody Is My Personal Diary”: They just can’t help it. They have to post every time they flushed in wash rooms, every time they dropped biryani on their clothes from Fabindia or every time they don’t feel sleepy or hungry or anything.
“The Paparazzi”: They would keep posting your photographs without your permission. And every time you would go to check your account, you might find your photograph dressed in rags and posing like a dumb ass with a guy you had a crush on. Imagine your mother comes from behind, now you explain it to her what are you doing with that guy.
“The Bhool Bhulaiyas:” Their status updates are like a maze. You start reading from the first line and then you wonder as to in which year this thing is going to end.
“Friends I went to meet Salman Khan today, even though I am not a big fan of Salman Khan, I went to this talk show organized by this news channel and met Salman Khan there. He was looking at me and I was blushing. Katrina Kaif was sitting beside him and she started to feel jealous. I haven’t done anything wrong I was not even looking at him, it was him who was looking at me, it is not my fault. I think Katrina will confront me with this question this why I was hitting on him, friends what will I do then? Any suggestions? And yes, I met Salman Khan today! Yippiee! I am so happy!”
Okay I have one thing to say to Katrina, whenever in your life you confront this person, shoot her!
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